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Sex at Dawn: The Prehistoric Origins of Modern Sexuality

Description

Since Darwin's day, we've been told that sexual monogamy comes naturally to our species. Mainstream science--as well as religious and cultural institutions--has maintained that men and women evolved in families in which a man's possessions and protection were exchanged for a woman's fertility and fidelity. But this narrative is collapsing. Fewer and fewer couples are getting married, and divorce rates keep climbing as adultery and flagging libido drag down even seemingly solid marriages.
How can reality be reconciled with the accepted narrative? It can't be, according to renegade thinkers Christopher Ryan and Cacilda Jethá. While debunking almost everything we "know" about sex, they offer a bold alternative explanation in this provocative and brilliant book.
Ryan and Jethá's central contention is that human beings evolved in egalitarian groups that shared food, child care, and, often, sexual partners. Weaving together convergent, frequently overlooked evidence from anthropology, archaeology, primatology, anatomy, and psychosexuality, the authors show how far from human nature monogamy really is. Human beings everywhere and in every era have confronted the same familiar, intimate situations in surprisingly different ways. The authors expose the ancient roots of human sexuality while pointing toward a more optimistic future illuminated by our innate capacities for love, cooperation, and generosity.
With intelligence, humor, and wonder, Ryan and Jethá show how our promiscuous past haunts our struggles over monogamy, sexual orientation, and family dynamics. They explore why long-term fidelity can be so difficult for so many; why sexual passion tends to fade even as love deepens; why many middle-aged men risk everything for transient affairs with younger women; why homosexuality persists in the face of standard evolutionary logic; and what the human body reveals about the prehistoric origins of modern sexuality.
In the tradition of the best historical and scientific writing, Sex at Dawn unapologetically upends unwarranted assumptions and unfounded conclusions while offering a revolutionary understanding of why we live and love as we do. (edited by author)

Reviews

Rating: 5 / 5
Date: 2010-09-06
Summary: "Testing your assumptions about life? This book will help."

This is the type of book that book clubs are made for. It is amazing the depth and breadth of issues brought out of the closet, assumptions dusted off, and new clarity poured upon them.

Sex at Dawn is not only about sex, although certainly there is ample material here for those who have not thought too much about sexual relationships to wonder why they ever believed the way they did in spite of such overwhelming countervailing evidence. Sex at Dawn also brings out some provocative thoughts (and scary thoughts) about the future of the planet. The impact that the advent of agriculture had on the planet, not to mention our species, is huge, and yet that is not well known outside of a narrow academic circle. It's hard to imagine how to fix an economy based on agriculture and consumption that has passed its sustainable limits, but this book actually does bring up some insights regarding these intractable problems.

Primarily, however, the book will make you think about your preconceived notions of sexual exclusivity. Having been both highly exclusive for most of my life, and non-exclusive for the recent past, I can attest to the benefits of the latter.

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Rating: 5 / 5
Date: 2010-09-06
Summary: "Worldview Changing"

"Sex At Dawn," whether you agree with it's conclusions or not, at least leads you to their reasoning through a scientific process of discovery. Without getting preachy, the authors make a very plausible case that humans are, in fact, not monogamous creatures naturally. This is not a book to incite emotional, political responses (though obviously it has, and will continue to), but instead to initiate discussion on some very difficult self-discoveries that we, as a society, must face.

"Sex At Dawn" has made me realize the difficulties of the life that we have chosen for one-another in the modern world, and how much work it will take to stay on the "high road."

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Rating: 5 / 5
Date: 2010-09-05
Summary: "Sex at Dawn"

Whether or not you necessarily agree with the ideas being presented, this book is engaging and entertaining! Best book I've read in a long time.

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Rating: 5 / 5
Date: 2010-09-04
Summary: "A must-read for every human."

This book has profoundly changed the way I looked at human sexuality. The research is significant, intelligent, accurate. Completely absorbing, I read this in under 4 days, and I tried to take my time with it too. I now have a real understanding of why we are the way we are, without trying to fit us all into these monogamous boxes that are frankly unrealistic for most of us. This explains why people have affairs, why marriages can be left in ruins, and why how it's possible to shift the dynamic of how one thinks in order to get past jealousy. I couldn't be a bigger fan of Christopher and Cacilda's groundbreaking, and fearless work. They are indeed brave. I'm so glad someone finally took a look at the standard narrative and decided there IS more to life than that depressing, repressive narrative we all seem to feel we have to suffer in and live up to.
(For one, as a woman, why should I feel like I have to be bought: ring, house, etc., to be married? Why are women supposed to be modest about their sexuality (prudes instead of "sluts") when as a woman I enjoy sex just as much as my partner? Who do you think is cheating with "men who cheat?" Women, of course. There is just something wrong with cheating and lying and deceiving, but there is something wrong with expecting someone to never, ever be attracted or lust after someone ELSE for the rest of their life after saying, "I do.")

It certainly gives one pause, and plenty of food for thought. We are after all, just great, big, smart apes.

Thank you, thank you, thank you for this wonderful book!!!

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Rating: 5 / 5
Date: 2010-09-03
Summary: "anthro perspective on monogamy"

informative like a textbook without being dry. Very interesting read if you dare to challenge the Western ideal social patterns as 'norm'.